Having a solid sense of self-worth is one of the most valuable attributes you can build. Whereas if you neglect it, you’ll develop a gloomy outlook on life, along with perfectionism, procrastination, and an inability to cope with obstacles.
Not to mention problems with relationships.
So, nothing good comes from ignoring your self-worth in hopes that it’ll repair itself on its own.
Luckily, you can take control of this problem and turn it around with some practice and effort.
You can do this, and it’s overwhelmingly worth it.
Building self-worth won’t be easy, but it will be one of the most life-changing things you’ve ever done.
Signs of low self-worth:
- Blaming. They blame other people due to a fear of taking responsibility for their mistakes. It becomes their default response, but as with all habits, it’s conquerable with practice.
- Sensitive to criticism. They cannot tolerate any acknowledgment of their flaws or mistakes.
- They’re preoccupied with their problems. They might be so absorbed in their mind that they can’t empathize with anyone else.
- Slouching. Your body language can show others how you think of yourself and others. Furthermore, this habit can lead to headaches and back pain.
- Anger issues. They might lash out or yell at anyone who criticizes them.
What causes low self-worth?
Many things can cause low self-worth. Here are some of them.
- Recurring health problems can lead to feelings of helplessness.
- A habit of negative thinking.
- In childhood, they may have had overly critical parents or caregivers. If the child couldn’t reach their expectations, they’d feel like they weren’t “good enough.”
Ways to build unshakable self-worth:
1. Boost your self-worth by showering yourself with praise
“Perfection’ is man’s ultimate illusion. It simply doesn’t exist in the universe. If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.”
— David D. Burns
At some point, we’ve all bombarded ourselves with negative, discouraging thoughts, and that didn’t work out too well.
So, try pointing out the good things you’ve done in life. What are you awesome at? Where do you excel? What are the amazing things you’ve done that you’re proud of most in life?
Write about the incredible things you’ve done. Go ahead and gush about your successes and your impressive qualities. You deserve it!
2. Gain self-worth by not expecting perfection
“No one has a perfect life. Everybody has something that he wishes was not the way it is.”
– Stan Lee
No one is flawless, so don’t expect that you can beat the impossible. Worse yet is to tear yourself down when you fail. That’s not going to be very encouraging to attempt anything in the future.
Be easy on yourself, you’re trying, and you’re getting better every day.
3. Forgive yourself
“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.”
— Robert Muller
Making mistakes is a part of everyone’s life, but you are not your mistakes. They’re more of a learning tool.
Forgive yourself for messing up, learn from it and try to move on.
Also, forgive anyone who has hurt you in the past because holding onto it is only upsetting.
4. Pay more attention to your thoughts.
Negative thoughts will damage your self-worth, so don’t let them slide. We don’t have to let our thoughts go on a rampage in our minds. Instead, we can challenge them with a more rational mindset.
Ask yourself if the thought comes from facts or assumptions. Also, would you ever say this to a good friend? If not, then you certainly shouldn’t say it to yourself.
5. Break free from the victim mindset
“I am not a victim. No matter what I have been through, I’m still here. I have a history of victory.”
— Steve Maraboli
Those with the victim mindset are focused on throwing pity parties about how others have wronged them. This habit is detrimental to their relationships and their well-being.
No one benefits from perceiving that everyone is against them. The victim mindset causes the person to always be on the defense because they think others will hurt them.
Be aware of when you think that the world is against you and try and see things more rationally.
6. Repeat positive statements
“Your sense of self-worth comes from you alone — never the opinion of others.”
— Robert Greene
Self-worth issues often arise from years of pessimistic thoughts. So, you’ll need to switch that around and start focusing on more constructive ideas.
It’s a fact that repeating anything will embed it into your mind. Affirmations are proven to change your beliefs and raise your confidence.
However, you could say that you’re going to work your way up to the top, and nothing will stop you till you become a success.
But you need to hone in on a few and dedicate yourself to repeating them at least once a day.
- Write down your most persistent negative thoughts.
- Now, write the encouraging, opposite version of them in the present tense.
- Choose affirmations that you’d most like to believe and to become true. What areas of your life do you want to enhance?
- Memorize them so you can use them to cancel out any future negativity. Visualize them being true and feel the emotions they evoke.
- Repeat these constructive messages until the gloomy thoughts fade.
Soon, you’ll default to optimism and not catastrophizing everything.
Here are some examples of affirmations to build self-worth but you can make up your own:
- I love myself including my quirks.
- I’m taking 100% responsibility for my life.
- I deserve happiness and success.
- Today, I unconditionally accept who I am.
- I cherish my unique qualities. I’m here for a reason.
- I’m so lucky for everything I have today.
- I forgive anyone who hurt me so I can let go of the past.
- I’m a good person and I’m worthy of respect and love.
- Always, I am worthy of being listened to and treated well.
- Others’ opinions of me don’t affect my value.
- It’s impossible to steal my worth.
Here are 100 more options as well. Repeat your chosen affirmations when you wake up and before you go to sleep. As you’re asleep, your subconscious will absorb these messages and bring them closer to reality.
7. Rewrite your old life story with self-worth
“Strong people have a strong sense of self-worth and self-awareness; they don’t need the approval of others.”
— Roy T. Bennett
Embrace and accept any pain you’ve endured. Soothe yourself as a good friend would.
Don’t deny any wrongdoing on your part. Please take responsibility for it and forgive yourself. It’s best to accept it and be okay with it because fighting against the past is a never-ending battle.
Besides, blaming others for what happened will build resentment. We all mess up at times.
8. Daydream about being carefree and full of self-worth
“True abundance isn’t based on our net worth, it’s based on our self-worth.”
— Gabrielle Bernstein
Visualizing activates the parts of your brain that light up when you’re living it. Furthermore, your subconscious, which plays a significant role in directing your behavior, communicates with emotion and visuals. So, it will take this as a command that you want to make this a reality.
In short, self-worth is similar to confidence and self-esteem in that they all need to be maintained by you. We aren’t born with permanent confidence; we have to develop it ourselves.
You are unconditionally worthy and valuable, regardless of how you might think of yourself now. No matter what mistakes you’ve made, you don’t lose value; you gain character!
If I was going to give you $100, but it was dirty, would you still want it? What if it was crumpled up and wet from the rain? Would you accept it anyway?
See, no matter what hell you’ve been through in life, you will never lose your worth or value. You’re always worth as much as anyone else!
We’re all on different pathways and therefore incomparable.
It is only in our mind and perception that we can imagine being less worthy than anyone else. I hope you continue replenishing your self-worth!
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