We all worry about other people’s opinions of us. Will they like us? Will they think we’re smart? Will they think we’re cool? It’s natural to want to be liked and accepted by others. But when you spend too much time dwelling on everyone’s opinions, it can hold you back from living your best life.
Furthermore, these thoughts can add an enormous amount of unnecessary stress to your life. Always wondering what people are thinking about you can make you miserable.
Although you’re the only one who truly knows who you are. Therefore, only you have the level of expertise to judge yourself. Sure, you have people in your life that know you, but you are you. So, other people’s opinions are negligible.
Keep reading to discover how to stop worrying about their opinions.
1. Learn who you are
If you don’t really know yourself, you might rely on other people to tell you. But that’s a terrible idea. Don’t give away all that power, especially not to strangers. Get to know yourself by journaling or meditation. Even spending time in solitude can help.
Take some time to learn who you are and what you want out of life. Ask yourself what you value. What are your goals? Do you have special talents? When you know who you are, you won’t feel the need to believe others’ opinions.
2. People’s opinions of you don’t determine who you are
“When it comes down to it, I let them think what they want. If they care enough to bother with what I do, then I’m already better than them.”
– Marilyn Monroe
People are going to have all sorts of opinions about you – and most of them will be based on nothing more than their own biases and preferences. So don’t take it to heart when someone says something negative about you. Just remember that their opinion is just that – their opinion. It doesn’t have to define you or determine your worth.
It’s important to realize that what other people think about you doesn’t mean that’s who you really are.
Therefore, don’t accept their words as the truth. You get to choose how you feel about yourself, so decide to be confident!
3. Overcome the need for their acceptance
“Care about people’s approval, and you will always be their prisoner.” – Lao Tzu
But, never put your self-worth in the hands of strangers or anyone else. Because with unconditional self-acceptance, you’re always worthy of love.
4. Stop trying to predict their opinions
“You probably wouldn’t worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do!”
– Olin Miller
You can’t read other people’s thoughts, so, it’s best to stop trying. Also, try not to take things personally. Not everyone is out to get you or put you down. Chances are, you’re wrong anyway. If you could see what they’re thinking, you’d find that they’re more worried about themselves and their lives. They aren’t judging you.
5. Don’t compare yourself to others
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
We’ve become obsessed with how many people “like” us on social media and in real life. If we don’t get these “likes,” does that mean we’re unlikable? Of course not!
You might think that everyone else is living their dream life, but in reality, they all have their problems and drama. However, they only show you their imaginary “perfect” life on social media. So, don’t believe what you see; it’s not real. They edit their photos and handpick their stories. So, it’s ridiculous to compare yourself to that.
6. Accept that not everyone will like you, and that’s okay
Not everyone will like you. So, don’t expect them to. It’s okay! In fact, all that matters is that you like you.
Besides, people who talk trash are usually upset by something about themselves. So, don’t let it bother you. Getting mad exposes your insecurity. So, stay calm, take it in stride and shrug it off.
Furthermore, some people want to see you explode in anger. If you get offended, you’re giving them power over your emotions. Then they’ll keep attacking you. By all means, don’t give them what they want!
7. Don’t allow their opinions alter how you feel about yourself
We can’t control what other people think of us, so their opinions shouldn’t be allowed to alter how we feel about ourselves.
Do you want to live your life for somebody else? Take some time and think about that. Also, ask yourself if it’s worth sacrificing your happiness for them.
The next time you find yourself worrying about what someone else thinks of you, remind yourself that their opinion is not worth the stress. Their thoughts can’t define you. You are the only one who gets to decide how you feel about yourself.
8. Don’t put so much importance on their positive opinions either
Needing praise from others is a surefire way to become a people pleaser. You don’t want to go down that road, so strive to let go of needing positive feedback. Even if you get it sometimes, it won’t always be there.
So, don’t put so much importance on their approval because you’ll be disappointed if you don’t get it. Then your life will revolve around whether they accept you or not, and that’s no way to live.
9. Become more tolerant of embarrassment
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
– Dr. Seuss
Would you hate someone for tripping or spilling something? No. Because we are all lovable humans and we make mistakes! That’s just how it is.
In fact, you’ll be more likable if you showed others that you can laugh at yourself and brush it off like it’s nothing.
Besides, those that love you won’t care if you mess up. People who don’t love you don’t matter. So, let them get filtered out.
10. Take criticisms better
“There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.”
Nobody likes hearing that they’re doing something wrong, but if you want to be successful, you need to learn how to take criticism better. Whether it’s constructive criticism from a boss or friend, or just a negative comment from a customer, you need to be able to listen to what people are saying and use it to your advantage.
Here are a few tips on how to take criticism better:
- Listen to what the person is saying because they may have a valid point.
- Don’t get defensive. It will only make the situation worse.
- Try to see the situation from their perspective.
- Don’t take everything so personally. It’s possibly not even about you.
- Use their criticism as motivation to do better.
- Thank the person for their feedback.
Learn to take advantage of criticisms because behind every negative remark is a lesson you can use to become a better person. Don’t take these comments to heart or obsess about them. Instead, ask yourself, “how can I use this to make myself or my business better?”
So the next time someone has something negative to say about you, just remind yourself that their opinion is meaningless. You know who you are – and that’s all that matters.
11. Only you have to deal with the consequences of limiting yourself
“Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.”
– Erma Bombeck
Someone might be jealous of what you’re aspiring to become. As a result, they’ll try to tear you down, so you stay on their level. But, you can’t let people take control of your life! You’re only punishing yourself by holding back your talents. So, build the courage to break through the negativity and put yourself out there anyway.
In the end, it’s about whether you like yourself, regardless of others’ opinions. You’re a human being with your own thoughts, your own experiences, and your own story. Don’t let anyone else tell you who you are. You know yourself better than anyone else does.
If someone in your life is constantly putting you down or telling you that you’re not good enough, it’s time to have a serious talk with them. If they won’t change their behavior, then they’re not worth your time and energy.
Surround yourself with people who see the best in you and who appreciate you for who you are. These are the people who will help you to reach your full potential.
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How will you stop worrying about others’ opinions?